TV: Rotting my brain or saving it?

I know people who don’t bother with TV. They don’t have cable and barely have a TV that works at all. They spend their time doing more useful things, like reading or hobbies. If they do watch TV, it’s all PBS or nature programs or The History Channel. (Sometimes, though, that backfires. My one sister, who has only bare-bones TV [no cable, one-channel reception], is INSTANTLY mesmerized whenever she encounters “real” TV. Deer in the headlights, unable to tear herself away, no matter what’s on. It’s priceless. My other sister and I have a field day with it: Assume the position — tilted head, glassy-eyed stare….)

Make no mistake: I really admire people who can do without TV. I think about how much more I could accomplish if my eyes weren’t glued to the boob tube every night. I might actually read a book once in a while, keep the house clean, cook a week’s worth of dinners in advance, take up a new craft or hobby. Instead…I look forward to 7:30 or 8:00 PM when I get to turn off my mind and turn on the tube (yeah, I know it doesn’t have tubes anymore).

I especially look forward to the nights my favorites are on. Please don’t call me on Monday nights during The Big Bang Theory or Two and a Half Men. Get lost during Lost on Wednesdays. Heaven help you if you interrupt The Office on Thursdays. Sunday nights are all about Desperate Housewives and Brothers & Sisters. And please don’t try to talk to me while they’re on (I’m not ignoring you honey, but it’s kind of important to listen to what the characters are saying…).

Why? One, I like to laugh, and nothing makes me laugh more than BBT, TAAHM, or The Office. Two, escape. Lost is just ridiculous enough to be engaging, and the amount of detail and obscure references that go into it is quite amazing. Three, as I told Mike last night during Brothers & Sisters, it’s all about perspective: “See what problems we’d have if you were running for governor and I had written a best-seller?” Whew, thank goodness that’s never gonna happen.

Mostly, though, I think it’s number four: I need someone else to do the thinking for awhile. I need to marvel at the storylines, jokes, and dialog some other, more talented hack for hire came up with. I need to forget my days are spent writing about that which I have only the most cursory knowledge or interest: like today’s topic: Economic Capital (EC), and today’s task: turning “bullet points” like this into a clear and engaging story: Assist in devleoping complete EC pilot process, including scenario generators, process for determining appropriate stress for each risk, interfaces between components, and correlation matrix; and Design and construct aggregator to combine liability results for various market shocks in to a single EC result using the correlation matrix.

Most days, it’s all I can do to clean up the dinner dishes before collapsing on the couch. (Did I mention we eat in front of the TV every night?) And no, I don’t have kids to take care of, a 5:00 AM wake-up time, a long commute, or office politics to deal with like many of you do. I’ve been exercising regularly, so “boosting my energy” hasn’t helped (though I’m getting hooked on having a cuppa joe around 3:00 PM every day, sometimes caffeinated). By prime time, I’m ready and willing to zone out.

Sure the winter and seemingly perpetual darkness play a role (dinner, and TV, are later in the summer). So does the omnipresent, staring-us-in-the-face fact that we should both be spending our nights working on one of the numerous this old house projects we have in the works. But we’re no spring chickens. We’re not that obsessed. And we have company like once every two or three months, so nobody sees our messes but us.

And, ya know, I just like to watch TV. I love falling asleep to it every night. I love turning on The Weather Channel first thing to see what the day has in store. I love that it’s always there to keep me company, should I get sick of being alone all day. I love living vicariously on HGTV.

Am I rotting my brain? Maybe. Probably. But I’m saving it too…letting it rest and recuperate so I can face another day of: Design inital output reports and analyses from projection models and aggregator, including treatment of diversification benefits, calculation of Risk-Adjusted Return On Capital (RAROC), and roll-forward attribution analysis.

I love TV.

I could have been a doctor, but there were too many good shows on TV. 
                                                                        ~ Jason Love

Tug of war

You know the saying: The left brain doesn’t know what the right brain is doing. (yeah, yeah, hands, brains, same thing) I have a lot of that going on.

My left brain is busy focusing on a boatload of work that, of course, magically happened at the same time. There is no planning in the hack-for-hire world. There is only “We need six case studies right away and we need you to bill us for them in advance, charging us for less time than you know they will take, and we won’t pay you for 70 days. Go.”

So I’m going. Two are drafted. The third is in the works. Interview #4 happens in 30 minutes. (Interviews 5 and 6 on tap for tomorrow and Monday.)

Left brain is also all, “Hey, you need to finish that mission statement rewrite and look at that Annual Report section you’re supposed to be editing. And don’t forget you need to visit your 90-year-old mother since you haven’t been there in almost 2 weeks and yesterday she got in the car and drove herself to the store for groceries, you loser you. And you need to finish her taxes and start doing your own taxes. And when were you planning to go to the bank to deposit that check?”

Left brain is such a nag. I’d love to turn it off, but it pays the bills.

Right brain, though, is another story. That poor, hopeful, underused lobe is focused on completely unproductive drivel. And it almost never stops.

“Ooooh lookie, eBay is full of cute handmade Easter schlock. Oooooh, you NEED an immersion blender because using the other blender to make soup is too hard. Oooooh, your favorite gardening blog is recommending a cool shade plant that you can only get mail order. Oooooh, you should really practice your sun salutations before class tonight. Ooooooh, did you enter the HGTV Dream Home giveaway today? Ooooooh, how about blogging?”

It’s not that I have ADD. I have no problem focusing my A on topics that are frivolous and easy and involve spending money. The DD only comes in when it’s time to concentrate on hard, boring, stressful topics. Like now. It’s time. T-14 minutes and counting till the next interview. (Left brain is watching the clock like a hawk.)

Both of these masses of gray goo need to just. shut. up. and play nice together. If that’s not possible, is it nap time yet?

No matter where you go or what you do,
you live your entire life within the confines of your head. 
                                                          ~ Terry Josephson

The new reality (again)

We had our lovely Steelers to see us through January, but now it’s back to winter and the longest month of the year. Four degrees this morning.

Sobering news yesterday via a writing colleague who also works for my primary client — as in, the client who gave me 2/3 of my income last year. As he informed me:

Last Monday a memo came from on high commanding all marketing folks to cease and desist spending on writers, designers, printers, etc. – all outside services. Finish existing projects, but don’t start anything new. There may be a few exceptions – key initiatives that really need to move forward. But the big chill is officially on for everything else. Ostensibly, it’s through the end of the fiscal year, May 31. But I think it will carry into next year.

Big chill indeed. I could feel it move down my spine through my hip into my purse and straight to my wallet. Brrrrrr.

Oddly, Mike’s firm is very busy — staying “lean and mean” (just 5 people across 2 offices) is helpful in times like these.

Of course I’m worried — we are a two-income family by necessity. But I also have a hard time believing my client can get by without any external service providers like me for the rest of the year. Of course, if it does hire people for projects, it may not be me.

Welcome to the new reality. It feels a lot like the old reality that came after 9/11 and at various other slowdowns in my nearly 10 years at this. Ebb and flow. Feast or famine. It’s the nature of the beast.

I have a new, large project in the works with this client, just starting next week, so that will keep me busy for a couple weeks. I also have a couple projects almost completed that I can finally bill for — always a good thing. Beyond that, it’s wait and see. I’m very grateful that we have “only” our mortgage and the regular slew of monthly bills — no credit card debt or car payments. We’re not very good at economizing, though, so we’ll see how that goes. House projects always eat up far too many funds, even though the majority are DIY jobs. We are still far, far better off than a lot of folks, so I can’t really complain.

But I can be extra-vigilant about the work I do have, do whatever I can to be the “smart choice” for any projects that arise, and take the opportunity to get other (office and household) ducks in a row in the meantime. Positive action begets positive results…right? For sure, if I start some big, time-consuming house project, I’ll get slammed with work. Maybe now’s a good time to start stripping wallpaper in the guest room…

Nothing diminishes anxiety faster than action.  
                                       ~ Walter Anderson

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