Wow. Just wow.

What does a “career-challenged” person do when she has free time with no assignments? She certainly doesn’t network or inquire with clients when those upcoming projects might surface or organize her office or update her website or any of a dozen other tasks that make good business sense. Instead, she takes a yoga class.

A hot yoga class to be precise. For the first time.

I’ve been meaning to go; the studio is owned/run by a former colleague of mine I haven’t seen in years. We recently reconnected on LinkedIn, and that renewed my wish to take a class with her. I had talked with my regular yoga instructor about taking a class there together, but this morning, spur of the moment, I decided to do it.

The class kicked my butt — I was the only one there (other people were busy working, no doubt) and she said afterward she “took it easy on me.” (POP — bubble bursting) Wow. I know I’m not in good shape right now, with too little exercise and too many winter pounds weighing me down, but in my regular yoga class, I’m one of the better students. This was so much harder, with 100° heat to boot. I’m whipped.

But that’s not the story. The story is, I got the chance to catch up with my friend after class. What I thought would be a “So, how have you been?” nonversation, turned into so much more.

How she’s been turned out to be that she had a double-mastectomy a couple years ago.The same year she opened her current studio (she had been in a smaller space). Seems she felt a lump in her breast that her doctor told her not to worry about — just a cyst. As it grew, she repeatedly called to say she was having that problem. They told her to lay off caffeine. When she finally sees him and gets a biopsy, she has Stage III cancer. So, double mastectomy and chemo follow. While recuperating from surgery and going through chemo, she of course decides to take more advanced yoga classes; she’s currently writing a book about teaching yoga; her studio offers special events with yoga gurus, concerts, etc., oh, and did I still mention she runs her “regular” business (a graphic design firm) as well?

As she told me the tale of her recent past and gave me a tour of her beautiful space, I was just amazed at all that had transpired in her life — devastating and amazing alike — in just a few years. When she asked me about business and if I was still living in the same place, all I could say was “Business is hanging in there. Slow, like everyone’s. Yes, same place. Still working on our fixer-upper” Seriously, my life now is no different than it was when we were working together. But hers? OMG.

This, on the heels of my “career-challenged” post yesterday, makes me think even more about how some people are so driven to DO things in their life, despite great adversity, and I’m just not. I’m generally quite happy to simply be (and, note to self, not nearly grateful enough to God for the blessings of health and “status quo”). Yes, I might dream of living a more creative life and daydream about possible “fun” jobs, but that’s as far as it goes. I’m in awe, yes, actual awe, of people like my friend. People who just never stop, or let themselves be stopped.

What an eye-opening morning. (Likely to be followed by an ibuprofen-opening evening.) And, God-willing, a blissfully predictable tomorrow.

The beauty [of yoga] is that people often come here
for the stretch and leave with a lot more.

~ Liza Ciano

Career-challenged

You’ve heard the tongue-in-cheek lingo…a short person is “height-challenged,” someone who can’t drive around the block without getting lost is “directionally challenged,” a new parent is “sleep-challenged.” Me, I’m career-challenged. As in, I’m terribly challenged when it comes to my work.

Take today…an ordinary day, slow, waiting for clients to give feedback or start a new project I know is coming. Wondering what the heck is going on with that other client who’s grown silent in the middle of a brochure project we’re weeks invested in. Then I get an e-mail from a client I haven’t worked with in over a year, wanting to know if I’m up for traveling to Phillie to cover a roundtable discussion (write up the event, possibly do a white paper or other piece about it after).

My first thought: I’d rather go to the dentist and get a tooth pulled.

A. I don’t like traveling.

B. I don’t like the pressure of having to sit through a roundtable on a topic I know nothing about and be attentive enough (and smart enough) to write about it afterward.

C. I don’t like traveling.

D. You get the picture.

One of the reasons I work for myself for considerably less money and security than I could get working somewhere else is that I want to be able to say “no” to assignments like these. But that doesn’t mean I feel good about it.

Mike would say, “You should do it.” (He’s very bottom-line focused. If it makes money, do it. Hell, if someone wants you to do it and it doesn’t make money, do it anyway.)

If I was at all concerned about improving my skills as a writer, I’d do it.

If I was at all concerned about making more money, I’d do it.

If I was at all concerned about my career, I’d do it.

But I’m just not. And I kind of hate that about myself.

Truth is, I live in my comfort zone, and I’m quite happy here. But all the pundits and business-types would advise me, for my own good of course, to break out of it…to establish “stretch goals” …to always be pushing to become better, stronger, faster….to get out there and network…to just do it.

But I know I won’t. I just don’t care enough. I’m good at what I do, but I only want to do what I want to do. So maybe that means I’m not so good after all?

Maybe if I had a job/career/vocation I was passionate about, it would come easier. Or maybe if it was a topic I was interested in…what if someone asked me to go to a gardening roundtable or cooking roundtable or decorating roundtable and write it up afterward? Yeah, I could see myself doing that. Looking forward to it even.

Clearly, I’m still trying to figure out what I want to be when I grow up.

Actually, that’s a lie. I know what I want to be. It’s called a housewife. And I know a lot of other smart, talented, educated, capable, gainfully employed women who want to be the same thing.

But for now, I suppose I’ll put my writing expertise to work, tactfully, perhaps regretfully, telling my client, whom I really like and hope to work with again, “thanks but no thanks.”

And I’ll hate myself for it. Even as I thank God for letting me be in a position to do it.

Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life.
~ Confucius

Choose a job you sorta like, but only on your own terms,
and you will always feel like you’re wasting your life.
~ Christine

 

There We Went!

Yeah, it’s always a sad day after in Pittsburgh when the Steelers lose. But I have to agree with several friends’ blogs that it’s not really any worse than any other loss. Maybe it’s because I don’t hate the Packers. Maybe it’s because we have won Super Bowls recently (the loss in SB XXX was SO much worse). Maybe it’s because I wasn’t really expecting them to win, and they still did pretty well except for the turnovers. Maybe it’s because the whole “event” seemed rather blah this year — no stand-out commercials, snow and seating glitches, ho-hum announcers and game presentation. I didn’t think the half-time show was that bad, but I did notice Christina Aguilera flubbing the National Anthem. Seriously…for a mega-million-dollar professional to do that was terrible. How about next year they forgo the soloist and just let the stadium full of fans sing it loud and proud.

It took a really, really long time to get our “one for the thumb,” and it may take us just as long to climb that stairway to seven. But it was great we got this far in a year when no one expected us to. (And, frankly, any SB New England isn’t in is pretty OK in my book!)

So, we’ll get ′em next time, guys! Thanks for a great season and for making Steeler Nation possible. And congrats to the Packers and their fans. Enjoy your championship year!

Defeat is not bitter unless you swallow it.
~ Joe Clark


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