Calgon, take me away.

What woman hasn’t uttered this phrase a few (dozen? hundred?) times since the legendary commercial aired?

If only it were that simple — take a bubble bath and escape.

Instead, just when I was getting back in the blog groove, I got hit with a crazy project that turned out to be much more than I anticipated (i.e., was told initially) and threatens to destroy my sanity (and possibly my reputation as a worthwhile contractor for the client). Oh, and did anybody but me notice it’s a holiday weekend coming up? One of only 3 precious summer holidays? Puhlease — no chapter rewrite for an accounting manual is worth this.

But, have I mentioned I’m a hack for hire? This is what hacks do to earn a buck. They long to write pithy, poignant, witty blog entries and end up trying to explain complicated topics of which they have no knowledge to already-knowledgeable professionals with the help of other uber-knowledgeable professionals who are too busy to explain the topics themselves.

At least, that’s what this hack does to earn a buck.

I hope to be able to get back to more interesting topics (at least to me) over the weekend. In the meantime, what’s new in your world?  If you can, take a Calgon break for me.

One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown
is the belief that one’s work is terribly important.
                                                            ~ Bertrand Russell

Oh no, it’s raaainnning again…

Supertramp anyone? It must have been subliminally hearing the rain on the roof all night long that put that song in my head this morning (and so, I pass it along to you). It sure has been a rainy spring, and now the too-early heat has drizzled away into a string of chilly gray days. Another drippy weekend ahead.

Work is also raaainnning again…got a challenging (hopefully interesting) new project today (a rush for next weekend, as I’ll only be able to start on Friday and it’s due the following Monday), on top of another new project to do next week, and the promise of several more projects hanging over my head. Why hanging? Because I’ve already been paid for them!

As their company approaches the end of its fiscal year, my clients (several different ones at the same company) need to spend the money left in their budgets or risk not being allocated the same amount next year. So every year-end typically brings a flurry of projects as well as requests for me to prebill for work to be completed next fiscal year. Dollars so carefully watched and controlled all year are suddenly dangled enticingly before the outstretched fingers of financial-security-deprived contractors like me.

It’s the proverbial bird in the hand, but feels uncomfortably like the carrot before the stick. Having taken their prebill cash, I’m now in debt — I OWE this work, I HAVE to do it, my CREDIT SCORE (i.e., reputation) is at stake, my clients are in control. 

Oh wait, I have the money, so maybe I have some power too. OK, I get that. But I don’t even know what the work will be — what if I don’t WANT to do it? Too bad, sister.

Mike thinks I’m nuts and told me in no uncertain terms to quit whining about it to him, so I whine online instead. 

I know I’m not the only one in this boat — how do my fellow free agents feel about this practice? Does it delight you or scare you? If you tell me it’s a nice problem to have, I will fully agree. But that won’t stop my anxiety. Or the rain, apparently. As I wrote this, I got another request from different clients at the same company to do another new project. And could I get back with an estimate by Monday morning?

The best thing one can do when it’s raining is to let it rain.
                                            ~ Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
 

Note to self: Keep the glasses ON

I keep going on and on about what a pretty spring this is. The view of our back yard (from the bathroom of all places) is one of my favorites. We’ve spent a lot of time working back here and still have a long way to go (can’t take credit for the azaleas, they came with the house). But it’s FUN, and we can’t wait to do more. (This particular view also hides the perpetual “burn pile” we have going.)

Unfortunately, we have a little obstacle in the path to the garden of our dreams. Here’s the view of the back yard when you take off your azalea-colored glasses…

Yes, we’re still waiting for our new retaining wall (even though we OK’d the estimate for it in February). And it’s been over a year that we’ve been looking at a muddy mess and dodging various piles of rubble in the driveway. Mike gloomily said the other day, “It’ll probaby be August before they show up.”

But that’s not to say we’ve been sitting around moping (well, maybe moping, but certainly not much sitting). Our kitchen remodel is done — without a doubt the biggest project we’ve tackled. And it’s beautiful, if I do say so myself.

I’m also very happy to say our garage door replacement is done — well, done as far as I’m concerned, Mike tells me there’s much still to be done, and he will fuss with it for a while yet, but the changes won’t be visible to anyone but him, so let’s just call it done.

We’ve also scoped out how we can create “the world’s smallest powder room” in a converted coat closet. We’re hopeful when the plumber is here doing our sewer repair (in August, with his friend the retaining wall guy?), he can tackle the plumbing for that as well. Here’s the “before” — before we tore the wall down behind the coats through to the hallway by our back door (connecting to the “cubby” where the refrigerator used to reside). I don’t even mind the mess (visible only from the back door) because it’s so minor compared to the kitchen upheaval for all those months.

Concurrent with (and sort of as a part of) the sewer project, we’ll also be repairing the front porch — fixing the damaged foundation and column bases and replacing at least part of the porch floor (with the rest a project for later). I dreaded having the front porch roof propped up (likely for months), but ya know, it is what it is. I can’t fix it any sooner, so I better learn to live with it. (And notice, the daffodils still bloomed.)

So, today’s lesson: Keep the glasses ON. For now, they’re azalea-colored, then they’ll be iris-colored, then peony-colored, and right on into rose-colored to salvia-colored to lavender-colored to black-eyed-susan-colored. I’ll have plenty to tide me through the next five months — right into a glorious maple-and-mum-colored fall. And after that…well, let’s just forget about what comes after that. Slush-colored glasses will never have quite the same appeal.

Being an optimist after you’ve got everything you want doesn’t count.
~ Kin Hubbard

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